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Today's Jokes

  1. A guy walks into a bar and asks for 1.4 root beers. The bartender says "I'll have to charge you extra, that's a root beer float". The guy says "In that case, better make it a double."
  2. A man is smoking a cigarette and blowing smoke rings into the air. His girlfriend becomes irritated with the smoke and says "Can't you see the warning on the cigarette pack? Smoking is hazardous to your health!" to which the man replies, "I am a programmer. We don't worry about warnings; we only worry about errors."
  3. Relationship Status: just tried to reach for my dog's paw and he pulled it away so I pretended I was reaching for the remote.
  4. Four engineers get into a car. The car won't start. The Mechanical engineer says "It's a broken starter". The Electrical engineer says "Dead battery". The Chemical engineer says "Impurities in the gasoline". The IT engineer says "Hey guys, I have an idea: How about we all get out of the car and get back in".
  5. There are only 10 kinds of people in this world: those who know binary and those who don't.
  6. Eight bytes walk into a bar. The bartender asks, "Can I get you anything?" "Yeah," reply the bytes. "Make us a double."
  7. I visited my friend at his new house. He told me to make myself at home. So I threw him out. I hate having visitors.
  8. A programmer puts two glasses on his bedside table before going to sleep. A full one, in case he gets thirsty, and an empty one, in case he doesn't.
  9. My husband and I were happy for 20 years. And then we met.
  10. My parents raised me as an only child, which really annoyed my younger brother.

10 jokes · updates every 60 seconds · next refresh 60s

👥

Visitors

17

Online now

161427

Total visits

Your IP 216.73.216.xxx
Address
United States Ohio Columbus · Amazon Technologies Inc.
👤

Last Visitor

Visit #161427
Arrived Sep 12, 2026 2:21 AM
IP 102.220.161.xxx
Address
Slovenia Ljubljana Ljubljana · VPS Dedicated LLC
URL
https://fdi*.shop:443/

📋

Recent visits · URLs (last 100)

OK 102.220.161.xxx · Slovenia Ljubljana Ljubljana · VPS Dedicated LLC
https://fdi*.shop:443/ Sep 12, 2026 2:21 AM
OK 216.73.216.xxx · United States Ohio Columbus · Amazon Technologies Inc.
https://fbr*.shop/ Sep 12, 2026 2:21 AM
OK 216.73.216.xxx · United States Ohio Columbus · Amazon Technologies Inc.
https://fbr*.shop/ Sep 12, 2026 2:21 AM
OK 102.220.161.xxx · Slovenia Ljubljana Ljubljana · VPS Dedicated LLC
https://fcr*.shop:443/ Sep 12, 2026 2:21 AM
404 216.73.216.xxx · United States Ohio Columbus · Amazon Technologies Inc.
https://fbo*.shop/sitemap.xml Sep 12, 2026 2:21 AM
404 216.73.216.xxx · United States Ohio Columbus · Amazon Technologies Inc.
https://fbo*.shop/robots.txt Sep 12, 2026 2:21 AM
OK 195.178.110.xxx · Andorra Andorra la Vella Andorra la Vella · Techoff SRV Limited
http://alw*.shop/ Sep 12, 2026 2:20 AM
OK 195.178.110.xxx · Andorra Andorra la Vella Andorra la Vella · Techoff SRV Limited
http://alw*.shop/ Sep 12, 2026 2:20 AM
OK 216.73.216.xxx · United States Ohio Columbus · Amazon Technologies Inc.
https://fbr*.shop/ Sep 12, 2026 2:20 AM
OK 195.178.110.xxx · Andorra Andorra la Vella Andorra la Vella · Techoff SRV Limited
https://alw*.shop/ Sep 12, 2026 2:20 AM
OK 195.178.110.xxx · Andorra Andorra la Vella Andorra la Vella · Techoff SRV Limited
https://alw*.shop/ Sep 12, 2026 2:20 AM
OK 216.73.216.xxx · United States Ohio Columbus · Amazon Technologies Inc.
https://fbr*.shop/ Sep 12, 2026 2:20 AM
OK 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/ Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/firebase-key.json Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/firebase-adminsdk.json Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/keyfile.json Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/key.json Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/application_default_credentials.json Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/.config/gcloud/application_default_credentials.json Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/google-key.json Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/google-credentials.json Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/credentials.json Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/gcp-sa.json Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/gcp-credentials.json Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/gcp-key.json Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/sa.json Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/service-account.json Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/includes/phpinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/core/phpinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/administrator/phpinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/wp-admin/phpinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/docs/phpinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/site/phpinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/public_html/phpinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/htdocs/phpinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/www/phpinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/preview/phpinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/qa/phpinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/uat/phpinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/beta/phpinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/staging/phpinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/phpinfo.php.save Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/info.php.bak Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/phpinfo.php~ Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/phpinfo.php.old Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/phpinfo.php.bak Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/smtp/phpinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/webmail/phpinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/hosting/phpinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/cpanel/phpinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/mail/phpinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/webroot/index.php/_environment Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/_environment Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/_profiler/phpinfo Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/server-status.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/server-info.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/old_phpinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/_phpinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/phpversion.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/php-info.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/info Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/public/phpinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/tmp/phpinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/old/phpinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/dev/phpinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/test/phpinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/admin/phpinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/debug.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/p.php Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/phpinfo Sep 12, 2026 2:19 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/test.php Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/pinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/pi.php Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/i.php Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/php.php Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
OK 2a02:c206:30… · France Grand Est Lauterbourg · Contabo GmbH
http://ide*.shop/ Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/info.php Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/phpinfo.php Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/config/app/.env Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/production/.env Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/development/.env Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/stage/.env Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/uat/.env Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/beta/.env Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/preview/.env Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/qa/.env Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/test/.env Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/job/.env Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/worker/.env Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/queue/.env Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/kafka/.env Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/rabbitmq/.env Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/elasticsearch/.env Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/redis/.env Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/mongodb/.env Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/postgres/.env Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/mysql/.env Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/buildkite/.env Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/travis/.env Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
404 34.18.189.xxx · Qatar Baladīyat ad Dawḩah Doha · Google Cloud (me-central1)
https://hdi*.shop/circleci/.env Sep 12, 2026 2:18 AM
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